How to Handle a Tantrum

You recognize it the second it begins. Maybe their little cheeks get red or they ball up their tiny fists. Maybe they fall to the floor crying or just stand and scream. It’s a tantrum, and it doesn’t take long for one fit to become incredibly overwhelming. Unfortunately, tantrums are a part of raising kids and as soon as your baby figures out how to express disapproval, they start turning up the heat to try and get their way.

Now, this is certainly not meant to scare you — although tantrums can be intimidating, approaching them with some strategies in place can help you rebound quicker to stop the tears without caving in.

What makes children throw tantrums? Most often, they throw tantrums because they don’t get what they want. This could be food, a toy, skipping their nap or even just being carried. Just like adults, babies learn what they like — what makes them happy, what foods they enjoy and what makes them feel safe — and when they don’t get those things, they can act out. The first thing to do is examine the cause of their tantrum, or the trigger, to figure out how to proceed.

First of all, let’s talk about some things that you must avoid when your child throws a tantrum:

  • Immediately giving them the object of their desire.
  • Yelling at them.
  • Calling them names like “bad” or “brat.”
  • Completely ignoring them.
  • Backing down from punishments.

These practices don’t address the issue head on. While they can be a quick solution — and one that may seem unavoidable at times — it pays off in the long run to take a few extra steps with a child who is throwing a tantrum.

Now for the correct approach to help you overcome tantrums and get back to your day with your happy child as soon as possible:

  • Get down on their level and talk to them about what is wrong.
  • Explain the situation and why it has to be the way it is.
  • Offer a solution or compromise that sticks to the lesson you’re trying to teach.
  • Be stern by explaining why their behavior isn’t nice.
  • Encourage them to apologize for their behavior.
  • Offer praise when they calm down and end the tantrum.
  • Give them plenty of affection.
  • Follow through with any promises you make about discipline or compromise.

And if you are the sort of person who likes to read up on this, there are literally thousands of books on parenting, but we like this one as it is a bit different

Tantrums can be more than a little frustrating, but they don’t have to completely throw a wrench into your day. Staying calm, as best you can, will help you reach a solution more quickly — remember, your children feed off your emotions. Calm and happy mom = calm and happy kids.  Hopefully these tips will lead to more smiles and less tears.